John Prine and Melba Montgomery recorded a great country song a few years ago: We Must Have Been Out of Our Minds." The song tells the story of a couple who foolishly broke up because they both thought they loved someone else.
Then they realized their mistake.
They both turned out to be the wrong kind. Oh, we must have been out of our minds.
That song should be LSU's theme song. A few days ago, LSU hired Brian Kelly, who currently coaches at Notre Dame, to be LSU's next football coach.
LSU and Kelly signed a ten-year contract for $95 million. Ninety-five million! And that doesn't include various incentives and endorsements. I predict Kelly will soon be promoting chicken fingers on local television stations–which will earn him even more money.
Kelly is 60 years old. What are the odds that he'll still be coaching for LSU ten years from now?
Not good, I believe. Scott Rabalais, a sports columnist for the Baton Rouge Advocate, pointed out that seven of the last ten LSU football coaches were fired.
LSU bought out its last two coaches' contracts. The university cashed out Les Miles for $10 million. Coach Orgeron, LSU's current football coach, got bought out for $17 million.
And Miles and Orgeron both brought home national championships!
Stephanie Riegel, writing last year for the Baton Rouge Business Report, said LSU is mired in moral bankruptcy. She referenced a video of the 2019 football championship team dancing to a "bounce" song titled Get the Gat at the White House.
The lyrics of Get the Gat are misogynistic, to put it mildly. Here are some sample lines:
You ain’t nun but a dope man’s bitch . . .
Cuz I’m a [N word] wit a rock hard bone
And I’m takin’ one of these hoes home.
Gat, by the way, is a slang word for a gun.
LSU must be out of its mind. The university recently renovated the football team's locker room at the cost of $28 million. The revamped facilities include a performance nutrition center and cushy study areas that feature "sleep pods."
Meanwhile, the LSU library looks like a Dollar Store on the wrong side of town, and the university is muddling through a sexual misconduct scandal by student-athletes.
LSU's communications execs tireless assure the public that all the costs run up by the football program are paid by the athletic foundation, not tuition money. Maybe that's true.
Nevertheless, all this football hype is not improving LSU's academic standing. The law school dropped 13 places in last year's U.S. News & World Report rankings. The university as a whole ranks 1lth in the U.S. News rankings among the fourteen schools in the Southeast Conference, just above Missippi State, Old Miss, and Arkansas.
But LSU is number one in at least one category. The university is the first SEC school to sign a sports-betting contract with a gaming company.
|Sleep pod in LSU football locker room: Nighty Night!|